Geek Life

Sexy Menu Review

Sexy Menu 2 | Sexy Menu Review | Gamerwife.com

Full Disclosure: I was given $50 credit on Seduction.ca (NSFW) for review/research purposes. All opinions expressed are my own. You can learn more about my disclosure policy here.

Sexy Menu | Sexy Menu Review | Gamerwife.com

Like most bloggers, I get contacted all the time to try out services or products to write about on this blog. Often the service in question just isn’t a good fit for Gamerwife and I decline, but sometimes… just sometimes… the offer seems so strange that I need to follow it up. Which is the case when I was contacted by Seduction.ca (warning: NSFW) to participate in a little “experiment.”

What Canada’s foremost Adult retailer wanted to know was this: if I had a spare $50 to spare on their website what would I do with it?

At first, I blushed. Then I laughed. Then I blushed. Then I laughed some more. Gamewife is a geek and gamer blog. I don’t write about sex toys?! Why would they contact me?

And then I noticed something on the Seduction website.

SEXY BOARD GAMES

Granted, board games are probably not the first thing most of us think of when talking about grownup bedroom time, but my curiosity was piqued. Could a sexy board game be any good? Would it actually be ‘sexy’? Could I even write about my experience online without bursting into a teenaged fit of mortified giggles?

Well, we’re about to find out.

After taking some time to peruse the games on offer, Rick and I opted to go with what seemed to be the least dirty-nasty and, frankly, most interesting game, called Sexy Menu. While most of the other games seemed to boil down to “have intercourse while pretending to play a board game,” Sexy Menu seemed more like an Adult version of Cranium, complete with modeling clay and body crayons.

The goal of Sexy Menu is simple enough, move around the board completing tasks from three categories: Artistic, Challenges or Intimacy and accumulate enough “Sexy Points” to order something from your partner off of the “Sexy Menu.” I won’t go into detail about what any of those things are because my mother in-law might be reading this, but I’m sure most of you can use your imagination. I will say that they range from the mild to the TRULY blush inducing, but are also written in such a way that you can interpret them however you choose as a couple.

They also suggest that you play the game with your favourite beverage handy and some sensual music playing, so we grabbed a couple of Mountain Dews, turned up the Sade and got down to business. *wink*

Sexy Menu 2 | Sexy Menu Review | Gamerwife.com

Predictably, there is not much in the way of strategy involved in a game like Sexy Menu, which frustrated my min/maxing husband Rick to no end. However, he acknowledged that proper balancing probably wasn’t a focus for the game makers and we opted instead to focus on the bonding experience the game promised to offer. To that end, I’d say the game is actually pretty successful. Whether we were laughing with or at the game, it definitely helped us to connect and we even discovered my hidden talent for sculpting body parts out of Plasticine.

Trips around the board do take a while, however, and my one complaint would be that the length of play does start to take away from any romantic vibes you created earlier in the game. That said, I’m sure the makers of Sexy Menu would be aghast that anyone would actually bother to take the time to “win” the game according to the rules. The other turn off were the vulgar cartoons used to illustrate the game’s currency, which looked like something you’d find in your bachelor uncle’s basement bar, but considering this is a game I bought from a sex shop I’m sure it could have been much worse.

Although certainly not for everyone, Sexy Menu was actually a lot more fun than either Rick or I expected and could make a hilarious (and helpful *wink*) gift for any nerdy brides or grooms to be.

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7 Comments

  • Reply
    kaycreate
    February 11, 2016 at 8:45 am

    I didn’t even know sexy board games were a thing ahaha! This looks pretty hilarious.

    • Reply
      Mariko
      February 11, 2016 at 11:32 am

      Yeah, I’m not sure how I was first introduced to this subgenre of board games, but this was definitely our first time trying one out.

  • Reply
    Fiona
    February 13, 2016 at 5:47 am

    I do love Cranium! Sexy menu actually sounds pretty rad though I’m such a prude I’d question myself whether I could get through it without giggling/blushing like a school girl. I’m sure Ben would appreciate it though 😛 Good on you for taking up the challenge and doing an awesome review!

    • Reply
      Mariko
      February 13, 2016 at 4:29 pm

      Rick is a good little Catholic boy and we were a little concerned that he’s be too shy to participate, but I think that’s actually half the fun.

  • Reply
    Mia
    February 18, 2016 at 8:20 pm

    Oh my god, this is HILARIOUS! What a post :’)

    • Reply
      Mariko
      February 18, 2016 at 8:46 pm

      lol. I’d glad you appreciated it. Some offers are just too crazy not to follow up.

  • Reply
    Friday I'm In Love #150 - Gamerwife
    February 19, 2016 at 9:00 am

    […] Children of Zodiarcs at Montreal Joue & hopefully cashing in on that massage I ordered off the Sexy Menu. […]

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